Therapeutic Effects of Trauma Play: Research Perspectives with Aidan Sunassee

Sep 4

written by Maja Metera based on an interview with Aidan Andreas Sunassee

Aidan Sunassee is a sexologist, sexuality educator, consultant and researcher, and an active member of the kink community. He is dedicated to bridging the gap between academic knowledge and lived experience, creating trauma-aware spaces where community voices are centered, respected, and empowered.

Aidan is affiliated with the APA Division 44 Taskforce on Kink and BDSM, serves on the research team at TASHRA, and is an educator at the Center for Positive Sexuality. His independent research explores how pleasure, power, and relational dynamics intersect with healing in kink spaces.

Beyond his research, Aidan offers workshops and classes to a wide audience. His goal is to meet people where they are, without pathologizing their stories, their pleasures, or their power.

We scream from the rooftops: kink is not therapy but it can help you bloom. Recently, I’ve had the pleasure to talk with Aidan Andreas Sunassee - a certified sexologist and kink researcher, who can shine more light on the blooming part. His research focuses on healing properties of kink, specifically trauma play - meaning “all BDSM activities that adults consensually engage in that are related to past trauma or abuse and for which the individual is actively aware of this connection.”

He initially became interested in researching kink and trauma play through personal involvement in the kink community. After being mentored by experienced kink researchers and community members, he focused his research on how trauma play in kink contexts could facilitate healing - a topic which, much like anything related to potential positive effects of BDSM, is widely underresearched.

Why Safety, Consent, and Aftercare Matter in Trauma-Based Kink

While (only?) less than 19% of kinksters attributed their kink interests to traumatic experiences, the research revealed significant benefits for those who do use it for healing purposes - regardless of their initial intentions or whether kink was strongly related to their identity. The only condition for no long-term negative consequences is staying true to the core of kink and BDSM - staying open-minded, educated, safe, and consensual, as well as providing aftercare.

“The difference between a healing process and retraumatization was knowing you are safe with the person. You trust that if you called a safeword or spoke up, you’d be cared for—not shamed—for stopping. That sense of control over the scene is powerful: you could choose to go through it consciously, or even consent to the element of surprise, knowing it was still your choice. Most importantly, you knew there would be a clear stopping point, and that you wouldn’t be left alone to spiral afterward. That safety isrooted in trust, consent, and open communication, and that is what makesall the difference,” said Aidan.

Benefits of Trauma Play

Participants who were properly educated about community values of consent, negotiation, and safety benefited from:

Yet, trauma play carries a bad name - especially outside the thick of the kink community. There’s a lot of fear related to possibly retraumatizing oneself. So much so that the few short-term negatives that came up with the research participants were primarily fears of emotional overwhelm rather than actual retraumatization.

Role of Pleasure in Healing for All

Aidan expressed that he wishes that pleasure and sexuality wouldn’t be so stigmatised as a way of healing - as within the pleasure hide practical embodiment tools which provide different results in the recovery journey for both submissives and Dominants. It is because there is more than meets the eye - yes, first in line is erotic pleasure, but what follows are enjoyment coming from intimacy and connection, as well as the catharsis and achievement from overcoming challenges. In other words, the combination of exploring difficult emotional territory within a pleasurable, safe context allowed kinksters to process trauma differently than through talk therapy alone - regardless of whether they played a Dominant or a submissive role in a scene.

“One of the Dominant participants said that ‘this kind of play and the connection that followed makes them finally feel like they were not a monster for simply holding space for both their and their partners’ healing’. There's so much more research that needs to be done with the dominant population as well. Because there's so much healing, there's so much processing being done there and I see very little focus on that area,” said Aidan.

So, should we ditch traditional therapy and just self-administer trauma play to heal our wounds? Absolutely not. It is crucial to first build an understanding of yourself and your traumas - but several participants reported that trauma play provided a somatic component that "clicked" healing into place after years of talk therapy, allowing mental healing to reach the body. Ideally, trauma play would be accompanied by talk therapy with a practitioner who is at least kink-aware, but ideally kink-affirming. Easier said than done.

Therapists and Kink: Troubled Relationship

Unfortunately, a lot of mental health professionals still carry several common misconceptions about kink and trauma play:

Meanwhile, research actually shows dominant-identifying individuals often demonstrate more compassion than average, contradicting stereotypes about these roles.

Thus, instead of giving in to the stigma, Aidan encourages therapists to acknowledge before their patients when they are out of their depth. Namely, stay curious - say they are not knowledgeable about kink but promise to work on that or, alternatively, refer the person to another, more informed, specialist.

Conclusion

In conclusion, Aidan supports the idea that "kink is not therapy," but he also strongly advocates for recognizing kink's therapeutic potential when practiced safely and consensually. Research suggests that for some individuals, kink can offer unique healing opportunities that complement traditional therapeutic approaches, particularly for embodied trauma processing.

Sources

Sunassee, A. A.. (2024). Pleasure Gain in Trauma Play as a Catalyst for Post-Traumatic Growth. 10.13140/RG.2.2.11099.99369.

Sunassee, A. A. Healing through trauma play: An Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis of Participants’ Personal Narratives. Manuscript in preparation for Archives of Sexual Behavior

Sunassee, A. A., Glynn, E., Ratcliff, S. E., & Westlake, B. Connecting the Dots: Discovering the Connections Between BDSM and Self Growth. Manuscript in preparation for Culture, Health, and Sexuality (Projected early 2026)

Sunassee, A. A. (2023). The therapeutic potential of play: A comparative study of play therapy and BDSM practices in trauma management. 10.13140/RG.2.2.35468.69762

Brown, A., Barker, E. D., & Rahman, Q. (2019). A Systematic Scoping Review of the Prevalence, Etiological, Psychological, and Interpersonal Factors Associated with BDSM. The Journal of Sex Research, 57(6), 781–811. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224499.2019.1665619

Erickson, J. M., & Sagarin, B. J. (2021). The prosocial sadist? A comparison of BDSM sadism and everyday sadism. Personality and Individual Differences, 176, Article 110723. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2021.110723